Roger-Luc Chayer
Mario signed up and opened an account on Gay411 in mid-March and decided to put only one picture illustrating the bottom of his back, the curvature of his kidneys, without nakedness and indicates in his profile to be 28 years old and only look for something simple. Hardly the account activated, in the hour that followed, he was literally bombarded with messages, about 48, most of them very aggressive or downright sexually offensive.
« A guy wrote to me, without showing up or asking me the least question, that he wanted my address so that he would come immediately to me … », tells us the young man rather shaken of his first experience on the networks dating. « Another questioned me very intensely about sexual matters to the point where, in spite of my requests to stop, he continued to talk to me about his fantasies including that of raping me » continues the tears in his eyes the young man who comes from finishing university and having a little time before finding a job to make gay friends or just meet for a little privacy. He was so traumatized by this first day on Gay411 that he asked for the closure of his account and in the meantime, he put a picture of a big-bellied man, changed his age to 54 to have peace. and stop receiving incessant messages. He adds that the harassment and verbal abuse came mainly from men aged between 45 and 60 who had profiles showing rather vulgar photos of themselves or parts of their bodies. It was too much, Mario returned to his old applications as Grindr …
What Mario experienced is far from unique. Salman, 21 years old,
is a newcomer to Montreal and, feeling safe in the country to live his homosexuality openly, opened a Grindr account showing a very nice picture of him with the mention that he was looking for love. Cute like everything, you tell me!
Except that he was imprudent enough to invite a man in his 40s to his house at 2am, without knowing anything about him, his address, or a telephone number. On his profile, the man looked physically fit. Salman has always had a soft spot for more mature men, more virile than him. Surprised, opening the door of his apartment, appears a very old man, potty and far from the person shown in the photo. Very uncomfortable with the situation and worried, Salman asked the man to leave, because he did not fit the profile, but the other did not hear him so … « He entered the house I had to go back because I was scared and he told me that I had made him move for nothing, that he was entitled to at least a pipe, with an angry look. I was terrified, I was shaking and it was obvious. Unfortunately, my phone was in my room on the recharge, I could not call for help without him following me. When he saw that I did not want to, he said he could ask for it louder and wake up the whole building. I had the idea to tell him to speak less loudly because my roommate was sleeping in his room, which was wrong. The guy raised his eyebrows and was visibly scared, he said let go and left. « In this kind of situation, even if the threat is online or in person, never hesitate to contact the 9- 1-1 to report physical or verbal aggression. The police take denunciations very seriously. At worst, bring along Gai Écoute, an organization that helps LGBT people!